Saturday, January 23, 2016

"I wish you knew how much you are loved..."



One curious thing that has happened since Liliane left this world is that I've suddenly gained the ability to remember more of my dreams upon waking up. Whatever the meaning of this may be, I have been quite grateful for this newfound gift as it's quite useful in remembering the dreams I have of Liliane.

My most recent dream of Liliane involved my mom, Liliane, and myself driving in a car with Liliane behind the wheel. (For those of you who don't know, Liliane never got her driver's license which is why it was rather strange for Liliane to be the one driving.) In any case, I'm not exactly sure the circumstances that led to me saying this, but at one point, Liliane had her head on my shoulder - (perhaps because she was sad, scared, overwhelmed...?) - and I said to her, "I wish you knew how much you are loved."

And then the dream ended up getting a little trippy, as dreams tend to do, and we found ourselves driving down this roller coaster-like road with huge peaks and valleys; except that the road was made out of these giant foam cushions decorated with bright green pine trees.

I can't say I quite know what the last part of the dream means, but I do know that the quote I remember from the dream - which I should point out is rather notable since I don't usually remember the dialogue from my dreams - is exactly what I wish I could tell my sister; even if/when my actions may seem to suggest otherwise.

I can only hope and pray that Liliane and I were able to part ways with her knowing and feeling secure in the love I have for her, even if I teased her or drove her crazy with my crazy bad habits - (or fail to post on her blog as often as I mean to...)